BACK TO BLOGThe start of the school term is always a mix of nerves and excitement. Fresh uniforms lay out the night before, new stationery, school bags and shoes waiting to be used.
For most children, it’s a chance to see their friends again and start new subjects. However, for some, the return to school can be daunting, especially for children in foster care. That “back to school” feeling can come with extra weight.
Changes, even something as ordinary as a new teacher or a different classroom, can stir up anxiety. For children who have already experienced disruption in their lives, these transitions can feel heavier and sometimes overwhelming.
With that in mind, let’s look at some simple, supportive ways you can help a foster child ease those first-day nerves.
Seeing the new school term through their eyes
School time is full of transitions, for example, moving from the classroom to the playground or switching between subjects. For young people in foster care, who may already be coping with grief or unsettledness, these small changes can feel magnified.
A new teacher may echo a sense of instability. A friendship wobble can feel like rejection. Even simple things, like not knowing routines yet, can stir up these feelings.
That’s why it’s only natural for these emotions to spill over and create challenges with confidence or behaviour.
Taking the time to understand school life from their perspective can give foster carers a clearer appreciation of these struggles and better support children as they navigate a new term.
Gentle preparation before term begins
A calm start often makes all the difference. Where possible, reach out to the school before term starts. Share key information teachers need, from contact details to helpful strategies, and try to introduce the child to their designated staff member. Knowing there is someone looking out for them can ease a lot of hidden worries.
If the school allows, an early visit can help, too. A quiet tour of classrooms, a quick hello to staff, even a walk around the playground. This makes the “first day” feel less like stepping into the unknown.
At home, simple conversations about what to expect, like what time they’ll leave and who will pick them up, can help the child feel secure. Talk about fun things that might happen after school, such as having their favourite meals for tea or a family movie night. Knowing that there’s something safe and enjoyable waiting for them at the end of the day provides an anchor to hold on to.
Supporting those first few weeks
The first weeks of a new term often help set the tone for how safe and settled a child feels. Establishing a consistent routine, such as waking up at the same time and having a calm breakfast and drop-off, can make mornings significantly less stressful. Some children also benefit from a “comfort item”: a small object in their pocket or school bag that reminds them they’re not alone.
Before school, a short mindfulness activity or a calm chat can help regulate emotions. At school, knowing they have a “go-to” person, like a teacher or teaching assistant, gives them someone supportive to turn to if things feel overwhelming.
It’s also hugely helpful to keep communication flowing with teachers. Regular, brief updates make it easier to spot challenges early, and quick adjustments can stop little worries from growing into bigger problems.
Learning with care
Every child learns differently, and for those growing up in foster care, past experiences can sometimes impact concentration or mood in the classroom. If you notice persistent struggles, don’t hesitate to speak to the school about assessments or SEN support – they’re there to help.
It can also help to create a quiet and encouraging environment for homework or reading at home. It doesn’t need to be a perfect study space, just somewhere calm, where effort is noticed and encouraged. If the child is behind, extra help from tutors or simply breaking work into smaller steps can help them feel less overwhelmed.
Building friendships and confidence
As we know, school isn’t just about lessons. It’s about friendships and belonging. Foster children may need gentle encouragement to take small social steps, such as joining a lunchtime club or sitting with a new friend at lunch. Celebrate every bit of progress, however small, whether it’s putting their hand up in class or playing alongside others.
Linking school to their hobbies and interests, such as sport, art, music, or reading, can also help them feel more settled. And remember, self-esteem doesn’t just come from academic achievement but from every small success: attending regularly or trying something new.
Keep a close eye on their emotional wellbeing, too. If you notice ongoing anxiety, withdrawal, or changes in mood, don’t hesitate to ask the school about support or counselling. Sometimes, just knowing they have someone else to talk to can feel like a huge weight has been lifted.
Nurturing progress over time
Settling into school isn’t about getting everything right at the start. It’s about creating steady routines and support that continue week after week. Regular check-ins, whether weekly or fortnightly, can bring small worries to light before they grow.
Keeping close contact with teachers and key staff through ongoing conversation can also make it easier to identify any issues and adjust routines if something isn’t working. And with the added encouragement of community groups and mentoring schemes, you can create a foundation of support that lasts over time.
How FosterTalk can help
Supporting a foster child through school is deeply rewarding, but it can also bring moments of uncertainty.
At FosterTalk, we’re here to ease those pressures, offering guidance, resources, and a community that understands what you’re facing.
Our confidential helpline gives our members direct access to experienced advisors who can talk through school-related concerns, whether that’s navigating SEN support or dealing with bullying.
Alongside this, we provide practical training and resources to help you feel confident in supporting your child’s education.
From webinars on trauma-informed approaches to advice on managing behaviour or learning differences, these sessions are designed to give you strategies you can use straight away.
Equally important is the chance to connect with other carers. Through online forums, support groups, and community events, we create safe spaces where you can share experiences, swap ideas, and remind yourself you’re not on this journey alone.
For more information on helping your foster child feel safe, supported, and ready to thrive at school, FosterTalk members can get in touch with a member of our team today.
